Contradictions of my heart
"I just want to be alone, but I don't want to be alone anymore...."
I recently wrote a song based on that phrase. It popped into my head one day, and was born of a spontaneous moment of honesty. Selfishly, I desire my "down time--" some unquestioned indulgence in solitary peace and quiet-- but am simultaneously struck with the fear of being left alone in the end. I desire the absolute freedom of independence and yet still long for the promise of intimacy and comraderie, to know that "someone's on my team."
Ultimately, I can see that both sides of the coin can only truely be met in Jesus. He is our Peace, our rest. And He is the One that sticks closer than a brother.
Funny how we like to think we are such complex beings, creatures of enigma and mystery. The answer is simple. It's Jesus.
No More "Recycled Strength"
You were wearied by all your ways, but you would not say, 'It is hopeless.' You found renewal of your strength, and so you did not faint. ~Isaiah 57:10
It is a frightening thought that we can become so self-sufficient, so self-sustaining, that even in vanity and the things of our flesh, we are re-invigorated. We can muster up the zest and the zeal required for certain tasks, and actually begin to forget that our "righteousness" lacks the influence of God. While this passage may have been speaking to overt "immoral sins," such as promiscuity and idolatry, it can certainly apply to our spiritual pride-- even noble-seeming desires, clothed in false humility.
Like Samuel, we are called to minister before God first, and then before man. When we grow weary by all of our ways, let us not recycle our fleshly strength, but let us examine why we have become weary in the first place. Let us acknowledge that "it is hopeless," and surrender our ways to Jesus. Only He can truly restore our strength (Isaiah 40). Only He can fill every thing in every way.
"Family Pictures"
Here are some pictures of people you may know or have heard a ton about!
Tyler, Tomina, and Mikey (Aww...)
Girl Huddle: Bethany, Becky, and Julie
The Legendary Prayer Huddle (at Mt Doug)
Kayla and Chris (plus Tyler jr. and the back of Elanzo's head)
"...I will build you with stones of turquoise, your foundations with sapphires. I will make your battlements of rubies, your gates of sparkling jewels, and all your walls of precious stones." Isaiah 54:11-12
